When I visited Switzerland after my junior year for the Nazarene International Institute, I didn't have a chance to do much sightseeing. But there is a surprising amount of beefcake art. Here are the top 10 public penises:
1. Beginning in Zurich, where most international flights land, this statue of a kneeling flutist by Peter Hartmann.
2. It's not exactly Michelangelo's David, but this David by Ivar Johnsson outside the Opera House has its points of interest. Like Goliath's head at his feet.
3. What other city memorializes a homoerotic encounter, like this Ganymede about to be abducted by Zeus in the form of an eagle? He looks like the bird is about to become a pet rather than a boyfriend.
4. Geneva, the largest French-speaking city and an important center of international politics, features its own David.
5. Lausanne boasts a museum of sports, which is quite boring, except for the nude statues on the grounds, such as this Archer.
1. We were delayed, so we arrived during rush hour.
2. At the Thai restaurant, they brought my partner's food but not mine. Some investigation revealed that the server put my food on another table and forgot about it.
3. The club was completely deserted, on a Friday night.
4. The Flexx Spa was completely deserted, on a Friday night.
5. Except for a weird guy walking around asking people to pull his....hard! HARDER! HARDER!!!
6. They wouldn't let me leave. They kept stalling and putzing around, waiting on other people first, stalling some more, until I yelled "Let me out of here!!!"
7. The only way to the highway was past railroad tracks, where a 1,000 car train was going by slowly. All of those movies you've seen where a car races a train? Bosh! You could easily outrace it on foot.
8. The hotel LITERALLY changed location. It was on a different highway from when we left. We drove 10 miles out of the way before thinking "This isn't right" and plugging in the GPS.
It took 10 minutes to get from the hotel to downtown Cleveland, and 45 minutes to get back.
9. Let's not even talk about the hotel room....
10. No, I didn't see either of these two guys. Not even close.
You probably know that Andy Warhol, the gay-yet-homophobic pop artist, was the son of immigrants from Miková, a small town in Slovakia, near the Polish and Ukrainian borders.
You probably don't know that the nearby town of Medzilaborce features the Andy Warhol Museum of Modern Art, established in 1991 to celebrate Andy's Slovak heritage.
It was a tough sell to the locals, who worried that the museum would glorify the "homosexual aspects of the drug parties." So it tried to make him a good Slovak communist (later, a good Slovak Catholic). There are paintings of butterflies, flowers, and a Russian hammer and sickle. His gayness is not mentioned.
To emphasize his loving (and presumably heterosexual) family connections, there are also works by his mother (a drawing of the Annunciation of our Lord), his brother Paul Warhol and nephew James Warhola.
But no beefcake. Not even this cover that James drew for Robert Heinlein's sci-fi novel Stranger in a Strange Land.
Still, locals stay away, and parents won't even allow their children to attend the art classes held on the site, for fear that the gayness will rub off on them.
There's another Andy Warhol museum in his native Pittsburgh, considerably larger, with 17 galleries and 900 paintings. Is it any better at acknowledging Warhol's gayness?
They do a little better.
True, you can walk through the entire permanent exhibits of giant Campbell's Soup cans and silkscreens of Marilyn Monroe without ever suspecting.
And the biography page on the website discusses his college career, his Catholicism, the Factory, his celebrity interviews, his visits to Studio 54, but not his gayness.
But the gay-themed work is available for those willing to dig, like the short film, Tarzan and Jane Regained, Sort Of (1963), starring Davis Hopper and Taylor Mead (top photo).
And some of the special events are gay-inclusive. In 2012 there was a book signing and reception for Lance Out Loud, a biography of the gay icon by his mother, Pat Loud.
So, like the "outsiders" of Howard Becker's classic sociological study, it's invisible to most people, but you can find it if you're "in the know."